VoiceLine

I firmly believe that everyone comes into our lives for a reason. Whether we choose to regret our experience with these people or not, each person teaches us a lesson. This can come in the form of past relationships, fallen friendships, or anything in between. 

When these close-knit bonds begin to fade out of our lives, it can become easy to forget how we lived without them. There is nothing more heartbreaking and confusing than grieving the loss of someone who is still alive, just living without you.

But following that thought process can be dangerous. It can derail you from moving on with your life and growing into a stronger and more emotionally mature person. I’ve come to relate this grief to the idea of “haunting the narrative.”

Haunting the narrative is a literary device that is used when a character’s absence in a series majorly affects the outcome of the story. But can this happen in real life? Only if you let it.

Growing up in a small town leaves it hard to avoid people. Everyone knows everyone and you are almost guaranteed to run into someone each time you leave your house. This is an adolescent’s worst nightmare. For many reasons but one stands above all. Everything reminds you of them. 

You can’t get anywhere without driving past their street, the thought of seeing them from a distance fills your mind. Any car could be theirs, any time you go out, they could be there. Even staying home, your phone has to remind you of this person with random memories.

Grief is a process, but unless you embrace it, it will consume you entirely. People change and people grow apart, that’s just human nature. As tragic as it is to come to terms with, letting one person define your life, no matter which of their actions impacted you, takes all individuality from yourself. 

You are no longer your own person, you are a shell of yourself living in the shadow of them.